Friday, July 30, 2010

Keep Calm & Carry On

1. I am terrible at interviews.

2. I had my gall bladder removed..if you are reading this and had no clue? don't feel left out..most people didn't.

3. I still tell people i'm from Detroit even though I moved to Indiana in 2001. I just don't want to lose that part of what makes me me.

4. I am a lifelong Detroit Tigers fan..but in Chicago I root for the SOX!

5. It's easy for me to walk away from people that hurt me..sometimes I look back, but only if you can't see it.

6. My love life should be considered a handicap..I truely believe I should get special parking because of it.

7. I should probably apologize to most of the guys that kissed me in 2008..only one of them made my heart beat a little faster.

8. I love to travel..I've only been to Canada, England, Japan, Mexico and Israel..but I really want to go to Italy, Peru, Ireland, and Spain in the next few years.

9. "I'm not that girl" should be my tagline

10. I feel like people don't give me a 2nd chance very often..

11. My hero is the baby brother..he's the best person I know.

12. My best friend's name is Demecina..she'sthe only person in the world with that name..Google it!

13. I should probably join Shoppers Anonymous!

14. My hebrew name is "Ariela Fayga" it means "Happy Bird"

15. I was half-born on the sidewalk outside the hospital..I was painless..and blue - like a smirf!

16. My biggest goal right now is to pay off my credit card debt.

17. I definitely was Latina in a former life.

18. My favorite earrings are silver hoops.

19. After going to Israel, I really wish that I had kept up with my jewish studies all these years..I feel like its a part of me that is missing.

20. Valentine's Day is the worst day of the year for me.

21. I've never been in love.

22. When I say I would take a bullet for someone..I mean it..I don't know what other people mean when they say it..but i'm from Detroit and be don't really mess around with that kind of statement.

23. I have guys that have been in my life for so long that I consider them substitute boyfriends..even though I don't want to date them or for some reason we didnt work out..they make me smile and make the being single days not so hard.

24. I never tell people i'm scared..i'm not big on that admitting to weaknesses thing

25. My middle name is Faith..and I think I have more of it than most people are ever blessed with knowing.

Thursday, July 29, 2010

Post Hoc

As per usual the hardest decisions we make in life are usually the ones that have the added bonus of causing the most pain.  The decisions that we think are best don't always come naturally, and defintely don't [initially] come with a sugar-coating.  Unfortunately, there is no guidebook to life; no little halo-bearing (wo)man magnificantly whispering inspirational phrases in your ear, no soundtrack constantly humming the tune to your favorite song pushing you forward when you want to run backwards, and no flashing red lights to illuminate the wrong paths.

As we grow up, our decisions also become more complicated; they effect more people, they make and break personalities, and build awkward silences where its never existed.  The emotions of the people that care about you seem to fall to the wayside, and hearts tear in unnatural ways.  As you search for something that you can't put your finger on; change. 

Sometimes friendships suffer as you chase you dreams, sometimes they stand still, and other times through your pain you find the rarities that end up meaning the most.          


Giving advice to female friends regarding heartbreak and relationships can be an incredibly hazardous experience.  Partly because women are always of 2 minds about everything; but mostly because they are [hopefully] not pod people.  When relationships go sour, women struggle with a number of difficult decisions.  These decisions are wide ranging and depend on many variables: length of relationship, problems (cheating, bad habits, annoying quirks, clingy-ness, etc.), personal background, baggage, blah blah blah.  As far as I can see it there are two main roads to take when delving out this sort of advice [if you dare].

You can stress:
1)  Walking away
2)  Sticking it out

Either way, you have to stress that they have to make the right decision for themselves and no one else; which unfortunately is usually the hardest one. 

Sometimes walking away is the hardest thing to do -  to not stick with your comfort zone and run back the minute he calls with his sobbiest excuse, I mean apology; staying would be the easy option.  Pretending that this is just a rough spot [that happens all to often] is easier than starting over, than being alone..because let's face it - for most people on this planet, being alone pretty much sucks.  Have you ever noticed that people who say they love being single usually drink [heavily] and manage to find someone(s) to fill their bed [like it's there religion].  Walking away and giving up are not the same thing.              

However, there are a lot of people that are willing to give up at the first sign of trouble [red flag, warning].  Most times these are the people that have poor relationship histories and are trying to be smart.  These are also the people who are perpetually alone.  Not being able to trust another person romantically is a potentially harmful condition [disorder].  Being alone because you are too scared to feel is a painful reminder of what someone else did to you, what someone took away from you - your ability to let someone in; being numb is not normal.  It's not always a good idea to stay and fight for your relationship; sometimes its past that point, but you have to keep in mind that all relationships have problems.  If you run away from happiness, it's like chasing a ghost - pretty much not gonna get you anywhere.

Think about it..     

Thursday, July 1, 2010

Grey Gardens

There are a LOT of shades of grey out there, however, in my current state of limited BS tolerance - i'm not interested in any of them.  You can spend your whole life "what if"-ing yourself- but the only "what if"question that I ask is "what if today was it."  There are a lot of things in life that are nice - but those things are fleeting.  Nothing is set in stone, and nothing is forever.  As time passes things change; and so do people.  Enjoy what you have while you have it, but learn to let go.  Sometimes pain is an unecessary reminder of what you don't have anymore.