Monday, March 7, 2011

Full-Length Mirror

I've finally completed my first potential article.  A dozen or so edits, 7 reviewers, 2 meetings with the chair of Valparaiso University's English Dept. and I'm here.

Where is here exactly?

I'm not completely sure.  Somewhere between the moment where my dreams come true and absolutely nothing more than walking on hope.  The reality of the situation is that I'm sitting on a piece of writing that could be the difference between me being a no one and me being a no one plus one published article.  Before you start with the smallest violin joke, let me assure you that I am not questioning myself; I am not saying "no one" like I'm some sort of non-existent entity.  I'm a force (at least in my head), I have a head full of relevant and not-so-relevant thoughts, and I consider myself a good person to keep around (and not just because you have an above average chance of going on a free vacation courtesy of my "luck").

I think this is one of those moments that people refer to as: "a defining moment."  When I look in the mirror, I see the woman I want to be, the woman that I will be.

I'm waiting to hear back from a particular magazine about there policies on submitting unsolicited articles, and until that time (or the time I e-mail them again tomorrow) I am basking in the fact that I feel as fearless as the girl who looked back at me in the mirror so many years ago, the girl who knew who I could be.